"Paternity"

I guess Larry Birkhead is happy. This past Tuesday the daughter of Anna Nicole Smith, was determined to be his child. He and several others had claimed paternity in this case. It is interesting, that after James Brown died in late December of last year, many people came forward claiming to be his children.

Now, does it not bother us to see such irresponsible behavior treated so lightly? You might say, "Well they are trying to determine the paternity." Do you know why they are trying to determine paternity? Because, both Anna Nicole Smith and James Brown left behind large estates. Even when Anna Nicole was alive, Birkhead was claiming paternity, presumably, because of money.

But my point really is that baby-making belongs in marriage. We seem to have done a better job of relaying the message that single parenthood is not responsible behavior in the teen years. (I believe statistics show that there has been a decline in teen pregnancies.) Of course, adults are not being so responsible, births to single mothers in their 20's and above are on the rise. Society is saying, "Don't have a child when you are under 20 and have no money, but when you get to be an 'adult' you can do it whether you can support that child or not."

The problem is that society refuses to place the moral demand of responsibility upon people. It used to be that family units were similar in their demands of children. Most children would be raised to respect marriage and the responsibility associated with raising children. Now, celebrities publicly flaunt their sexuality and irresponsibility. The result has been a "trickle-down" effect--"If they can live irresponsibly, why can't I?"

Every person must ask themselves, "To whom am I responsible?" The answer should be "God, and my fellow citizens." Only when individuals make the personal choice to conduct themselves responsibly before God and society will we begin to stem the tide of indecent conduct that is hurting us all.

I truly feel sorry for the little girl, Dannielynn. She may grow up with truckloads of money, but the heritage left her biological parents is not very pretty.

"I Hear You, And I Care"

Six words. Sometimes, they are all we need to hear. They can be uttered verbally or they can be communicated by a hug, a note, a pat on the back, or by an action taken to alleviate the stress or burden. In fact, it is my opinion that our need of this message in its verbal and nonverbal forms may be a 50/50 split—sometimes we need to hear it and sometimes we just need to experience it without the words being said. The message is: “I hear you, and I care.”

Life can be very stressful and there are times we all come to a point where we feel overwhelmed. It is during those times that we need someone to come and help us with the overflow. The interesting thing is that we give off signals and others pick them up. Most of those who know us well, know when we are happy, sad, annoyed, frustrated, angry, etc. They even adjust their approaches to us as they interpret the signals we send out. It should not be too difficult to go a step further and, when we get the message of distress, send back, in some manner, “I hear you, and I care.”

There are few things in life more frustrating than going to someone you believe can help and then being turned away. It may be a problem at work…It may be a relationship problem...It may be a dread of the unknown...It may just a “down” time of our life. Whatever it is, if we send a friend a signal and they refuse to help us, we can become even more discouraged.

Imagine the thoughts of the woman who approached Jesus in the incident recorded in Mark 5:25-34. She, according to Mark, “had endured much at the hands of many physicians and had spent all she had and was not helped at all, but rather had grown worse…” This woman needed to hear the message, “I hear you, and I care.” Even though she was healed when she touched his robe, Jesus took the time to stop and talk to her—in the midst of his own stressful moment. (Jairus’ daughter was dying and he was on his way to Jairus’ house.) His compassion for the woman is evident even above the miraculous healing that took place on that day.

Chances are, there is someone you know right now who is sending out signals that tell you he or she is needing to hear, “I hear you and I care.” Please take the time to convey the message and then follow up. You may not be able to help in a significant way, but “just listening” may be the thing most needed. It may make a world of difference.

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17).